Carry-on luggage rules you don't know about: An insider guide

I fly a lot, so I try to travel with just a cabin bag.

Until recently, the only problem I'd encountered was during a trip with Tim the Yowie Man, who had been carrying a homemade "yowie-caller".

The yowie caller was a tin can on a string with a nail inside, and it was confiscated by a security guard at Brisbane Airport who refused to believe it was a device to lure mythical beasts.

However, at Melbourne Tullamarine Airport, an unpleasant security guard who x-rayed my bag removed my skipping rope and told me I wasn't allowed to take it onto a plane.

He then, quite impressively, mimed what I assumed to be a passenger garrotting a pilot with a skipping rope.

He said that nobody could take any sporting equipment on board a plane, and that my rope was "the same as a cricket bat".

While I have nothing but respect for anyone who tries to hit a cricket ball with a skipping rope, it would have been easier for me to strangle the pilot with my laptop cord.

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Another security guard kindly showed me the Civil Aviation Safety Authority's Dangerous Goods app which, he said, I should check in future before packing my bag.

I downloaded the app, and there is no blanket restriction on taking sporting equipment onto planes. The app specifically states that passengers can carry squash, tennis or badminton racquets. Prohibited items are "sporting goods, kitchen utensils, tools, and OTHER [my emphasis] things with sharps edges or points capable of injuring someone".

I complained to Melbourne Airport via BPMS@mealair.com.au. When they did not reply after a record 19 months, I approached the airport's media people, who referred me to the Aviation Security (Prohibited Items) Instrument 2022, which bans sharp items, blunt instruments, flammable goods, replica weapons, and restraints such as handcuffs and cable ties.

The media officer suggested that a rope might be classed as a "restraint". But cuffs, like cable ties, are lockable, whereas skipping ropes, like scarves, are not.

The media officer also asked me to point out that passengers are allowed to bring more than 100ml of liquid on board a plane - even though lots of people still scull their drinks before they go through security.

After almost two years, a Melbourne Airport "spokesperson" finally replied that the airport is governed by the Aviation Transport Security Act 2004, which outlines goods that cannot be carried onto a plane but "is not exhaustive and places significant discretionary strain on airports to create a definitive list or set of rules around what is considered safe to fly. Melbourne Airport would support any steps taken by the government to provide clarity for airports and passengers."

Apparently, the government has established a working group to look into this issue.

But I still wondered what had happened to my rope. The media officer thought it might have ended up in the lost property office, along with a recently discovered sex toy and an artificial leg.

So at least it went to a good home.